FORGIVENESS
It was suggested to me that rather than give up something for Lent, I should spend the forty days reading about, meditating on and trying to really comprehend one of the virtues. Forgiveness seemed a natural for me.
For the first few days it was pretty frustrating. Everything was a bumper sticker like , “Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself.” Now bumper stickers are ok. They wouldn’t be bumper stickers if there wasn’t some truth to them. But not very deep.
There were suggestions of action, such as writing everything down and burning it. Sense “release as your words are carried to Heaven”. I actually did that and it helped a little, but I couldn’t figure out who in Heaven would want my ugly words.
But Lent lasts forty days, so I persisted. Gradually seemingly unrelated ideas started to fit together. And it started to make sense. Forgiveness isn’t a life choice, it is life.
The Lord’s prayer says it best. “Forgive me my trespasses as I forgive those who trespass against me.” The “as” in that section is not a conjunction but a conditional. Someday, I will be judged with the exact compassion, mercy and understanding I grant others.
Pretty simple, but not easy.
On the last day, I will supposedly be asked “What have you done for the least in my Kingdom.” So we all think of the starving, homeless and persecuted people we encounter. But I have come to believe the question is much deeper. The “least in my Kingdom” are the very people we are most angry at. The people who betrayed us, discarded us, told us we were not good enough those who have hurt us in the most profound ways. Did we truly forgive them or did we rejoice at their misfortunes? Did we engage in petty little revenges?
Still simple, but getting there.
Twenty days gone, twenty days left. Half way to understanding?
A rich man approaches Christ and asks to follow him. He is told to go and sell all his “stuff” and return. Sadly, the man turns away. It is just too hard. Again we assume this is about I Pods and dishwashers, --- and it is. But it may also be about the emotional goods we hold onto so strongly. To truly be a Christian is to release the things that we hold dearest – our grudges – our hurts- our need to “get even”. Those are the hardest things to give up.
BUT
You cannot serve two masters. To be a follower of Christ you must give up those most cherished hatreds, and see your enemy as they are-- fellow creations of God who are feeling the same hurt, the same rejection, the same fear you are.
Still simple, but nearly impossible to live.
Hence
“Many are called but few are chosen.” I have always thought that last may be a mistranslation. I think it should read, Many are called but few choose. To be a true follower of Christ requires a choice to surrender our human nature and replace it with divine nature, something we are organically unable to do. So, we must follow Christ to the very best of our abilities, with the assurance it is the effort, the desire that matters. We will never fully reach the goal, but it is the journey that matters.
In the end the bumper sticker I fell in love with was
“ Forgiveness is giving up all hope for a better past and using that energy to build a better future.”
So Lent has ended, and I think I have the WHY down. I hope to have the HOW down someday soon.
***** Just a footnote for anyone who stumbles on this and is not Christian. I think the failure here is all mine. I am simply not well enough versed in other beliefs to relate the ideas here in meaningful; ways. But I think the ideas are still valid.